I don’t know if you noticed, but during the last year I’ve been polishing my personal style a lot, and also the outfits based on it. It doesn’t care if I’m having parisian vibes, grunge vibes, or a mix of both (as in the most of times), thanks to taking personal styling classes (and planning to keep doing it) I’ve been able to take the most of my advantages and work where I don’t have them. I enjoyed it, and it’s been a first effort to channel my fashionista energy. Also, it’s fun to feel that now each time I go the mall I can find people who owns and runs the stores, classmates from the course, or people who generally recognize me.

But I won’t find everything perfect because of it.

On the same way I enjoy to take the most of my body, I also apply critical thinking to say: according to what? Because, have to say, all of the famous “rules” follow just one objective: looking as binary as possible. Accent your waist, longen your legs, see yourself skinnier, etc. Even if you learn that “everything is about equilibrating”, and while agreeing with it, everything goes there. And it’s difficult for me to fit that with the reality where I live, where I see the queer theory everywhere I see, and where, because of that, I face a challenge.

So, I learn but I don’t use what I learn? That’s not the idea. Every once in a while I take the “passing privilege” concept for a walk (local slang, oopsie) to support myself on this. Essentially, given that you “pass” your voice is heard more often. Why do you think that most of the “icon” trans women are supermodels or very pretty people? OK. That. And that’s not a bad thing per se, as I lived much more peacefully because of this.

And then, even if I’ll always support your body positive efforts and tell about your non-binary existences as an example of resistance, I do this to strengthen my “protective shield” against the society, and also my self-esteem when facing new times now that my transition is legally finished, and to start a more conscious cycle about my style in function of the climate emergency.

I’ll tell you more about it in the next episode.

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