I turned myself into what I used to hate.

I’m saying this because of a particular, recent episode: my third anniversary of HRT.

While I was uploading that photo (the one that’s above), I said: “let’s try with a few bucks” to promote it. It was, idk, a milestone? The balloon was bought for that day, I used helium, I was wearing makeup, there was work behind it. Then, I thought, I wouldn’t be wasting money; finally, it’s good to know how these things work for when you work with them, on yourself.


The results? I liked them. For a dollar, I had a lot of exposure but a low engagement. That’s logical, I only wanted to be seen, an hedonism fueled by the apparent power of a credit card. So, in that way, isolating the fact I’m giving money to Facebook only for exposure, things were fine.


But the problem for me comes when I integrate this into my life.

I’ve said this, and I’ll say it again: I’m just getting my life back. And I have a lot of pending project in my life. Let’s have a look:

  • Take away any non-essential material stuff.
  • Buy more shoes.
  • Learn to use colors in my clothes.
  • Improve my photography skills (particularly composition).
  • Work on my stretching and resistance.
  • Try to run 10k.
  • Redecorate this bedroom.
  • Reach B1 on French.
  • Reach B1 on Japanese.
  • Keep my C1 and reach C2 on English.
  • Complete my pending series list on Netflix.
  • Pay my short-term debt.
  • Raise a fund for my independence.
  • Change my name and gender on my ID (finally!).
  • Renew my IELTS results.
  • Leave this country and travel so, so far.

With these tasks:

How could I be interested on becoming “well-known” on Instagram?

It wasn’t important on Twitter. My follower ratio there is 3, and I’ve met wonderful people; but I don’t do it for the metrics, I do it to have fun. If I bought the camera, is because I want to learn to be a good photographer, not a promoter who sells stuff. I want to be honest, and share it with everyone.

Even if my metrics go like shit because of that.

PS: I won’t talk about the theme today, there will be specialized posts about it. That’s why I’ll share some photos I didn’t publish about my third hormonniversary, because that’s what it’s all about! Posting inedit photos, and being happy. Everything’s SOOC, taken with my baby.

(Yup, that’s helium; I still have from my birthday balloons)



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